For the ladies only (skip it if you're a guy)

W...T...F...
Is it me? Okay, probably it is. But we need to put a stop to this. It's gotten out of control. I mean, I'm a hot-blooded female like the rest of you - and who doesn't want to be pushed up against the wall & properly kissed...but ENOUGH. Seriously.

I'm talking about that expectation for a guy to pick you up and f&#! you against the wall.  Face to face.

NO.  Stop it.

First of all, it's an awkward angle. Logistically, it's impractical. Even if you're picked up. (And really That guy has to be The Rock, or you have to weigh less than a small tiger for that to be...I don't know...comfortable? Trust me. It's not. [No, I'm not petite, though, so there's the hole in my rant. Hahaha! "Hole." But I digress.) It's not hot, to say the least.

Look at this guy. He looks like he's about to drop her. I feel kind of bad for him - it's clearly an awkward photo shoot. Lame.

This one's about to pull a neck muscle. That doesn't turn me on. That's the bad kind of "tension."

Secondly...oh, F-it. You know...I'm so annoyed with this sad perpetuation of failed expectations that I can't even bother with a "secondly." For the love of god, let him put you on a surface. Or kiss up against the wall, and have the decency to spin around and get your pleasure from behind. Like a self-respecting...person/lover/(fill in the blank)_________. Really. Let everyone enjoy the moment, you over-Lifetime-faux-porno-pertuated-myth selfish bitch.
(I'm not talking to you, of course. I'm talking to the "others." You, I love. :) )

Mas vino, por favor!!!  The night is young! :)